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Is Burrito


French philosopher, Albert Camus, believed life held no inherent meaning—that we should simply embrace the absurdity of a meaningless existence. Despite his lazy ass theory, we can give Albert a pass. Because, of course, Albert was French, and there are no burritos in France. And had he seen this wondrous food’s ability to unite an absolute cosmic clusterfuck of ingredients into a neat container of nourishment and bliss, he would have understood that we already possess the meaning of life; the single unified theory of everything; the antidote to chaos… The burrito. And if that weren’t enough, it’s also great for meal prep! Make a few ‘ritos in advance, freeze em and keep for less glonky times. Stay fed, muchachos.


Makes 3 burritos


Spanish-ish rice
1 cup of rice, I used jasmine
 1 tsp cumin
 1 tsp coriander powder
 1 tsp smoked paprika
 1 tsp garlic powder or 2 garlic cloves, crushed and minced
 1/2 cup of tomato sauce or crushed canned tomatoes
 1 tsp black pepper
 1 tsp soy sauce
 2 cups of water or vegetable broth
 1 tsp salt, or more to taste
 1 tsp of olive oil
Sautéed veggies
A handful of sliced mushrooms
 A handful of asparagus chopped into bite sized pieces
 2 handfuls of fresh spinach
 2 fresh garlic cloves, crushed and roughly chopped
 1 tsp of red or white wine
 1 tsp of thyme, fresh or dry
 1 tsp of cooking oil
 Salt & pepper to taste
Black beans
1 can of black beans
 2 garlic cloves, crushed and roughly chopped
 1 tsp cumin
Meat in buffalo-enchilada sauce
200g of Juicy Marbles meat, cut into chuncks
 1/4 cup of hot sauce, I used Frank’s Red Hot original
 1/4 cup of tomato sauce or crushed canned tomatoes
 1 tsp soy sauce
 1 tsp white or red wine vinegar
 2 tbsp maple syrup, honey, agave or brown sugar
 1 tsp dried or fresh oregano
 1 tsp garlic powder
Pico de gallo
1 cup of tomatoes, chopped as small as possible
 1 white onion, minced
 1/2 cup of parsley and/or cilantro (or other fresh herbs), minced
 1 tsp salt, adjust to taste
 1.5 tsp’s of red wine vinegar, white vinegar or lemon juice
 1 tsp olive oil
Other good things to add
 Unsweetened soy yogurt
 Plant-based sour cream
 A side of nachos


For the Spanish-ish rice
1. Heat a medium non-stick pan or pot. Add your spices to the pan and toast them for a minute or two, until they’re fragrant.
2. Next, add a little olive oil and rice to the pan. Toast the rice for about 2-3 minutes until it starts to slightly brown. Then add the water, tomato sauce, garlic, soy sauce, salt & pepper. Cover and allow to cook for about 15 minutes, mixing as it starts to thicken.
3. Remove from the heat when the rice has absorbed all the water and allow to cool.
For the veggies
1. Heat a non-stick pan and add some oil. When the oil is hot, add the mushrooms. Sauté the mushrooms for about 7 minutes until they start to brown. Then add garlic, a splash of wine, thyme, asparagus, and spinach. Cover for 2 minutes and then mix. Do this a few times until the spinach and everything else is completely cooked.
For the beans
1. Open your can of beans and pour about 1/2 of the liquid out of the can, but not all of it!
2. Heat a small pot. Add your cumin powder, a little oil, and garlic. Sauté the garlic for 1 minute, then add the beans. Bring the beans to boil and then lower the heat. Allow them to simmer and cook for about 10 minutes. Then remove the beans from the heat.
Juicy Marbles with buffalo-enchilada sauce
1. Mix your hot sauce, tomato sauce, oregano, soy sauce, vinegar, maple syrup, garlic powder & salt in a bowl.
2. Next, cut your meat into bite sized chunks. Heat a non-stick pan and add some oil. When the oil is hot, add the meat. Sprinkle the meat with some salt and allow it to cook until each side is crispy.
3. When the meat is done, pour the sauce over it and toss the meat in the sauce. Cook the meat for another minute in the sauce as the sauce thickens and caramelizes slightly. After about 1-2 minutes, turn off the heat.
For the pico de gallo
1. In a small bowl, add all the pico de gallo ingredients. Mix well, and that is it!
Assembling the burrito
1. Heat a non-stick pan to medium heat.
2. Lay your tortilla down on a clean surface. Add all your components into the middle of the tortilla while leaving enough empty space on the sides to fold the burrito. Fold each side inwards and then roll the burrito.
3. Place your burito on you heated pan. Toast it for a few seconds n each side until it’s nicely browned. Then dig in!! Serve with sour cream, nacho’s and guac!

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